To say my son has problematic skin is an understatement.
Since he was a bitty baby his skin has always broken out in bleeding sores that itch and burn him. There never was a time he wouldn’t wake up with blood on the bars of his crib or scream in pain because his socks were stuck to his sores on his feet. He always itches, he always hurts. That is just how it has always been.
We started taking him to Doctors when he was around six months old specifically to find out what was wrong with his skin.
Dr: “Eczema. Here. Use this cream.”
Me: “But, um, it has steroids in it? Should I be covering my baby in this?”
Dr: “It will go away and you won’t have to use it again.”
Me: “WHY is this happening? I need to treat the problem, not the side effect of.”
Dr: “There is nothing else you can do.”
Now repeat this conversation for the next seven years of my sons life…steroidal creams, safe to say, they don’t do a damn thing.
Early 2009, we met a very open minded doctor. For the first time ever, it had been suggested that Trent might have severe allergy issues. (You can revisit that here.)
So. We have a little boy who is allergic to dust mites, cats and mold with allergy induced asthma. We are told to buy a house with no carpet and no forced air heating or cooling systems. Get rid of our cats and buy a HEPA bagged vacuum and clean daily. No vertical blinds and everything in the home has to be able to be removable and washable.
Jump from 2009 to now. We spend all of our savings/money/everything to buy a house, a much older brick building with no carpet and no forced air. This house has a steam heat system. This is perfect for his mite allergy…however, now his skin is multitudes worse. We are told steam heat and no forced-air is perfect for soothing Eczema and not blowing allergens all over the place. However, my guess, not so perfect for mold.
There is no visible mold growth anywhere at all. Most houses in Iowa have mold. It is very humid here in the summer, reaching 90% humidity some days. Buying a cheaper wooden home would have a far higher mold potential verses a brick house built by one of the wealthiest people in our region, though both choices are about 100 years old. Buying a newer home has such a high rate of chemical uses just being built that Trent’s asthma can’t handle it. He has extreme chemical sensitivities (Yes, this is why I make soap and things. So he can breathe and so I am not packing more chemicals onto his open sores.)
Honestly, a new house would have been the best choice, but we couldn’t afford having a brand new home built with a steam heat system. I am, for the first time ever, realizing the amount of guilt this causes me.
Today I sit here with a colossal mortgage, a giant brick house and I should have a healthy son. I don’t and I am doubting every decision I have made in the last three years. I feel massively overwhelmed because my son can’t even go to school today because he is covered in open sores. He has never had a appetite and he is smaller than everyone else. I feel like this is all my fault because I didn’t pick the right house for him. I can’t fix him. His skin, for the first time ever, was perfect while we lived in a roach infested apartment in Las Vegas. We should have just staid there.
Oh the joys of parenthood.
Has anyone else ever dealt with this type of skin condition? Anything. Often my son asks, “When will this not hurt and just go away?” and I have nothing to say to him. We go to another specialist today and I am requesting a skin lesion biopsy. Skin cancer runs in my family and I honestly just don’t know what else to do. What I do know is that if another doctor prescribes Trent steroids and tells us it will just go away, my next post is going to be about how a spent the night in jail for assaulting a physician.