Cussing and coloring.

Mother’s Day

For Mother’s Day this year we decided to go to Sioux Falls, SD. Since it is an hour and a half long drive, the kids decided to “pack” their flannel, kittens and fanny packs, like you do.


After we ran around the mall for a bit, we decided to head over to Falls Park. Van selfies are a must.20140512-111115.jpg

Nine years ago, we sat together, on this very rock. I am still in shock at how fast time has flown by…


If you want to climb the rocks…you have to take a million pictures for me first.20140512-111143.jpg


The weather was perfect! (Which I repeated at least a dozen times.) No “burn your eyes out” sun, just milky grey skies (yes! my favorite!) and a cool breeze. 20140512-111219.jpg


This guy. <320140512-111246.jpg




After climbing all of the rocks and not busting our skulls falling into the water and landing on said rocks, we decided to walk around down town and hunt for ice cream. We found a dinosaur instead.


20140512-111417.jpgAnd this guy. There were many more sculptures although most had exposed breasts and butts and the kids didn’t want me to photograph them. Fun haters.20140512-111513.jpg

Candy hunting.


Next it was off to the Cinedome to see The Lego Movie…again. BECAUSE IT IS THAT AWESOME!!20140512-114528.jpg

To top it all off, we had breakfast dinner at “our” roadside Denny’s while we waited out a crazy storm that soaked everything outside. There were tornado warnings a few miles from our home town, so we decided to wait it out and eat until we couldn’t move.20140512-114537.jpg

Seriously. Cream cheese frosting, cinnamon glazed pancakes? Yes. Because waistlines and eating healthy doesn’t count on Mother’s Day.20140512-114545.jpg

After we arrived back home I was gifted the most awesome gifts ever. I have this thing for ’40’s/50’s era kitchen utensils and green glass. Glorious metal and thick, invincible glass..20140512-114701.jpg

I haven’t gotten a chance to try the waffle iron, but the mixer works beautifully!! Just like I knew it would. 20140512-114714.jpg

 So while there was no big fancy dinner plans, no vases of roses and my daughter and I wore comfy pants during our travels, we were all happy to spend the day together. Mother’s Day is a time marker for me. A moment to reflect back and look at how strong our family is and how tight our bond continues to grow. My children have a taught me to find joy in the simplest of things…like rocks, pancakes and mixers. 20140512-114857.jpg

Seriously! The weather was perfect!


Very Tired From Climbing Kylee

Brussels Sprouts

I am trying very hard to expand our vegetable knowledge. A friend of mine filps her cookies for Brussels sprouts so I thought I would try and make them. I did a very forgiving roasted recipe with bacon. How could the kids not love sprouts and swine?

Brussels Sprout & Bacon

Sprouts & Swine

Amazing, right?!! Trent and Starla did not think so. But, they ate them without audibly complaining although they never once ran out of (adorable) grossed-out faces during the entire meal. While I would typically find this extremely disrespectful, I sort of agreed brussels sprouts weren’t the best thing in the entire world…

Trent's Gross Face

Starla's Gross Face

After they cleared their plates, I thanked them for not being assholes about eating something they didn’t like and we sat outside and watched the birds and ate ice cream. The real reason why we made it through the meal.

How else are you going to wash the sprout taste out of your mouth?

Not Sproutsphoto (40)


Mean Mom Kylee


Own Yourself

Photo credit: Facebook | An undated profile photo posted on Facebook by Maria Kang

Oh yeah…I don’t need one. However, I do love having a reason to pose in my pajamas. Toss in the kids and you have a real family portrait opportunity.

I Don't Need an Excuse.

Just in case you didn’t know, YOU are amazing. Your belly rolls, your toned abs, whatever intestinal casing you have, it’s all yours.

I am going to lay it out real simple for all of you.

You love cake? DIG IN. You love working out? Sweat it up!! You want to be healthier? Own it! You give no fucks? Highfive! See, we are constantly so hung up on body image these days that we forget one huge thing…to mind our own business. Worry about YOU.

But the little girls! They are so confused with the media and magazines!! Here’s a novel idea. Turn off the TV. Give your daughter an intelligent book. Have an actual conversation with a kid.

But what about fat/slut/skinny/whatthefuckever shaming! How about you put on your big kid panties, throw your middle finger in the air and strut your stuff? One of the coolest things about having your own body is that you get to do whatever you want with it!

Look, here’s the thing, you don’t need an excuse. If you aren’t happy, it’s your own fault. It’s not media or society or your asshole significant other destroying your self worth. You are. Don’t let any outside sources tell you how to think or feel. Just stop.

Just. Stop.

Letting go of fear, insecurities and anger isn’t easy. Neither is getting up at 5am on Saturday to score a full box of yesterday’s discounted doughnuts…but it is SO worth it.

It really is that simple and I debated writing an exasperated blog post to stroke our egos but I don’t have time for that shit. YOU, and only you, are in complete control of your thoughts. That inside space where no one can touch or see, is all yours. What you put in is what you are going to get out.

I choose acceptance. I choose happiness. I choose to close with the Beastie Boys.

We need body rockin not perfection
Let me get some action from the back section

Love, Kylee Lane

Your media is not the boss of our bodies.



Happy Halloween! (And why my kids are cooler than most adults.)

This year my kids chose to be Dr Who (Tom Baker) and Spock (TOS). Sweet deal because these are pretty easy costumes to pull off. We make the kids costumes every year, much like we do ours for conventions.

There is something very special about little nerd kids.
(Dad, seriously, we need to make sure the pattern is sewn right.)

Especially when they express their dedication to a specific character, much like cos-players do for conventions. (It’s only logical I dye my hair to match Spock’s, Mom.)

I also use the term ‘nerd’ loosely as whatever definition it ever had is completely lost in the pop culture realm holding geek and dork and whatever…However, these two are nerds like it is 1975. ♥ While we were trick or treating, every older guy knew who Starla was. Often we heard “Hey!! I haven’t seen a Spock in years!” or a random “Beam me up Scotty!” (Which was never actually said in the original series…) Sadly, not one single person knew Trent was Dr Who. Mind you, we live in a very small area and British television isn’t really hip to the jive in Iowa…except in our household.

While these two went from house to house, Rory and I staid back on the sidewalk watching our kids with absolute parental love. I don’t think I could have been more proud of my children. Starla was scanning every house with her homemade tricorder and Trent never once lost character, using British slang and odd Baker references the entire time. They had some story about why Spock and The Dr. were traveling together, because this was not just getting candy, these two WERE their characters. 

Although no one knew who Dr Who was, with any school friends we met along the way, Trent proudly demonstrated pure Time Lord pose, remarking, “Now they know Dr Who!” He was so excited to get to “teach” his classmates in passing about this marvelous character. At one point some snotty child asked Starla if she was a boy or a girl and Starla merely rose her eyebrow, much like Spock would have, if asked such as obvious and human like question.

Our weekends are filled with Star Trek marathons, meals are met with humorous one liners from the good Dr. and craft time is only put on pause for reading time. Markers and little scraps of paper are all over the house along with piles and piles of books and comics. We take our children’s interests very seriously, which was aided by primarily exposing them to the things WE loved very early on.

I have concluded this is the formula for producing a child that isn’t an asshole. Lots of chores, lots of family time, and lots of science fiction.

Also, Halloween is a pretty big deal for my husband and I. It was on Halloween, almost half of my entire lifetime ago, that we kissed for the first time. It was also on Halloween, years later, when Rory asked me to marry him. So, I can not help but spend this time reflecting back on how our offspring have turned out thus far. Halloween is our family holiday, much more than Christmas or Easter…we don’t even get dressed for those holidays…


The Lanes

I love Scott and Dragon*Con. Our future marriage…

Montgomery Scott

It is confirmed that I will be going to Dragon Con in Atlanta , GA. Woo hoo! My very first time and I am beyond excited. After two years of traveling, conventions are something I am finally comfortable doing. Getting to see friends that I have been stalking talking with for years now and squeezing the ones I only get to see once a year or so…

Dressing up? Why yes, yes I am…

I have always wanted to go all out and really put something together that captured my passion and obsessive attention to detail for a character, but it is really hard and extremely frustrating trying to do something that has never been done before…because it has all been done before, right? Wrong.

Enter Scotty. My most absolute favorite Star Trek TOS charatcter of all time? Ever?

Yeah. Most favorite.

Plus it gives me the perfect oppurtuinuty to execute a steampunk style, in my own way. Now, don’t get me wrong, to each their own, but I freaking haaaaaaaaaaaaaate when cosplayers glue plastic replica cogs on brand new leather and smack on a pair of goggles.

I quickly threw something together for inspiration. We all need a starting point, right?

The beginnings of Steampunk Scotty crossplay. I'm going to make the sweetest welding mask EVER. #TOS #DragonCon

I have already changed a million things in the last couple of days…I need to be wearing pants. Scott has a very basic uniform so there is no reason to fix what is not broken. (No pun intended…) I want this is be a crossplay, not just a female engenieer. Scottish corset? Check. Flask? Not yet.

Decided to go “just saved the damn Enterprise again from a catastrophic warp core breach” dirty style…

One of the things I am most excited for is that everything I will be wearing will be 100% authentic. From oil cans to welding mask to leather, everything will be real (in a sense that nothing is being made from new materials covered in cogs for the fun of it…) Everything will have a purpose, everything will be real engineering equipment and a fair amount of it will be period correct. Imagine, if you will, that the Enterprise was a train, not a Starship. It takes an engineer back to his origins and it is exciting.

Look what Rory found for my costume! They even still have oil in them. O.O #SteampunkScotty

Are YOU going to Dragon*Con? Dressing up? Who wants to come over and help me finish building the insignia and sewing rank??

My Heart Belongs to Colorado Today

After spending the week prepping for Mega Business Friday, I want to put it out there that everything is on hold until Monday. As posted on the Luxury Lane Soap facebook page:

“We are going silent today for Colorado. All business announcements are on hold until Monday. Shipping and production will continue as scheduled, however, networking is on hold as we take time to hug our family and friends. Please take today and spend some extra time loving those you care about.” 

Now, on a personal note…

I am completely stunned right now. Read: Theater Shooting

Some of the people I care most about in the world live in Colorado. From my oldest friend (Yes you, Courtney ♥) to my newest crushes, Colorado holds a lot of love from me. Words can not form in a way which could express the sheer panic when I heard the news because this is the kind of event the majority of my friends WOULD have attended. It hurts. It hurts knowing these people I love could have been taken away forever. People I only get to see once, twice if I am lucky, during the long stretch of a 365 day year.

Nothing I say can fix what has happened. There is a lot of pain happening for a lot of people right now and for the first time ever, I feel like I have been punched in the stomach with a chainsaw.

I am sending so much love to all of you right now. Words are just simply not enough today. 


Teen Vogue Birchbox! March 2012





– Essie Luxeffects in ‘Set in Stones’ (Full Size!)
I thought I would hate this glitter packed top coat…I was wrong. When painted on, it looks like splattered chrome paint!

Shiseido Pureness Oil-Control Blotting Papers (10 sheets)
I love blotting papers and these already made it into my purse. I don’t really feel they have anything extra special about them but we will see how they hold up to Iowa’s Intense humidity in a couple of months.

Tarte LipSurgence Lip Tint in Amused (Full Size!)
I wanted this SO bad. Primarily for the color. Right now I am really into a minimalist black liner, rosy cheeks and bright pink lips sort of look. However, this product falls short. It is more of a balm and not anywhere near a tint/stain. It is so glossy that it slides all over my mouth, never really soaking in and lasts maybe 20 mins tops. I would love to try this in a matte version.

Annick Goutal Petite Cherie Eau de Toilette
Boring. I love complex, deep scents, and this was more of a velvety spring floral. Lasted maybe an hour and left no lingering scent. However, this was a *teen vogue* themed box and I could totally see my daughter using this!! But for a price tag of near $100, that won’t be happening any time soon.

Twist-band Hair Tie
I love these hair ties and I really like the tealish color I got in my birchbox. I have almost bought a pack of these multiple times and always stop myself, because seriously, it would cost about a nickel to make a bunch myself.

Coupon Code to and a discounted subscription to TeenVogue.
Yeah…these little card stock inserts lasted 2 seconds before they were turned into gift tags and embossed with cupcake stamps.

Overall, a decent box. I still have my regular “adult” box coming later this week. I peeked at my profile and I know there will be TEAS! Score. I love me some hot tea.

What did everyone else get in their boxes?? What did you think of this months offerings? I am pretty sure they changed something in regards to their shipping service. Both of my boxes were mega late and that never happens. Boo.

If you are interested in checking out birchbox, they have a pretty sweet referral program and I get points to buy shiny things if you join via my link -> and if you don’t do birchbox, what other sample services do you use, if any? I am way behind the times and just recently discovered this type of subscription even existed earlier this year…